Dealing with Loss

Content Warning: Horse Death


My beloved thoroughbred, Laddy, died last night. He had a severe case of colic, and I had to make the incredibly difficult decision to put him down. I've never had to put a horse down before, and I am utterly devastated.

Laddy was not my dream horse when I first met him (a simple brown, lame OTTB), but he became my heart horse. He was the barn's problem horse, and they were fixing to get rid of him when I jumped in an offered to pay for his keep. I barely knew him at that point, but something in me told me that he needed me. Thus began our 2 year journey where he taught me more than I taught him. I learned an all new way of connecting with horses, and I watched Laddy go from an anxious gelding who couldn't maintain a walk and would bite anyone who came near him to the horse you could jump on bareback in just a halter to go for a leisurely stroll. He inspired me to become a horse trainer, a career I'm still working on but so excited about. He found his person in me, and I found my horse in him.

Due to a racing injury, I had plans to make him a liberty horse and only ride him for brief, gentle walks. Today, actually, was when we were going to jump in and really start our liberty work. I meant to go on Thursday, but it had been a long week (I work two jobs and work with 2 other horses), so I decided to give myself the night off. Of course I regret that now, but I know I can't beat myself up over that because I couldn't have predicted what happened Friday night.

The grief comes in waves. I know when I go to see my second (I guess now "only") horse, Sadie, it's all going to hit me full force again when I see the empty stall. I loved him so much. He loved me so much. I'm trying to not regret the time lost and focus instead on the time spent. Even though I've been busy these past few weeks, I know he knew I still loved him.

He saved me as much as I saved him, and I can't believe he is gone.

Does anyone have ideas on what to do with his tail? I kept it, of course, and I'm planning on getting one of those heart necklaces made with it, but I'm still going to be left with a lot of tail. I want to do something with it, but I'm just not sure what. 

Awe, I'm sorry to hear for your loss :( Losing animals is never easy
I lost my horse 2 years ago to cancer. Had him for 11 years and he was my first and only horse.
I kept part of my horse's tail. Still have it in a bag in a drawer. Haven't really had any ideas on what to do with it, might get a bracelet made one day with it.
If you need anyone to talk to, I'm here from time to time lately and am willing to lend an ear

I am so very sorry for your loss! I know how incredibly difficult it is... I had to put my Leroy down about 7 months ago and I was completely devastated! Leroy was my best friend too.

What I did with Leroy, was I made a keychain with his hair and I carry it on my backpack on one of the zippers, and it reminds me that he is still with me in spirit and he will ALWAYS have a very special place in my heart! If you ever need to chat, my inbox is ALWAYS opened so don’t be afraid to message me♥

You could plant a bush or tree with some of the tail in the soil. A long lasting tribute to him. 

I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing any pet is hard but there is something especially heartbreaking when our horses go. 

In the past we have always put braided tail in a picture frame that also includes a picture of the horse. 

I'm so sorry for your loss! 🤗☹️

I'm sorry for your loss < 3
I lost my first horse two years ago, he very suddenly started showing severe neurological symptoms and had to be put down. I kept what little bit of tail I could, he had matted it up during all of this, and my dad straightened an old shoe he had thrown. I still don't know what to do with it.

I am sorry for your loss. I understand what it means to lose a loved one (especially an animal one).

I think you could braid the tail and make a bracelet out of it or something to hang up in your room.